Hey. It's me. Yes. Believe it. Sigh.
It has not been a stellar start to 2010. I keep typing 2009 and maybe that has something to do with it - my clinging to the past, a past which was crap. I have been steadily working on putting air into 2010's 2 projects - both beginning with the letter "M" but so far have met a lot of resistance from the gods. I get discouraged and frustrated easily and even though I know it is just the 12th day of the year, I always wants things now now now. It's this "now" syndrome that often paralyses me when things don't go the way I had hoped and throw me into states of frustration and depression. Not on Day 12, Tamale. I know I am not that pathetic. I am not there yet, cause I resolved to make it work and I will. Not there yet. Not on Day 12.
Additionally, a dude I was really getting to know and like is now ignoring me and I am like"what the fuck is up with that?" I have been nothing but supportive these past couple weeks and then he starts playing an almost virtual game of hide and seek, only I am not fucking seeking. He can hide til he farts himself to death for all I care. What is up with these men? Are they men or mice? If you don't want to speak to me anymore for one reason or another, just say so. God. It is super lame. This is the same shit that started off 2009. An asshole just giving me the finger for no reason I could ever come up with. I won't say for no good reason cause hey...maybe they both think I am an asshole but wow...tell me. lol. Let me address my issues. You bet I am going to send this clown an email and tell him I think he is an asshole so at least he is made aware of HIS affliction! lol.
It never ends. Day frickin 12. Goodness.
