I feel like a loser!

So on top of mangling my hot glasses last week, I seem to have also lost my cell phone. I cannot find it anywhere. Now, I have 2 cell phones - the primary one I have, cause that never leaves my hand (lol). The secondary one - the one I used for business calls, but now hardly use at all - is missing. I was so tired on Friday morning that when I was transferring stuff from my khaki coloured purse to my khaki and army green handbag, I told myself I could not bother to look for the phone in the deep recesses of the bag just then. I would take the one I always use and look for the Motorola after. I got home, did not bother to look for it. Yesterday morning, I looked in my bag and it was not there so I concluded it was somewhere in my room, among the clutter. I just cleaned the room and the phone is nowhere to be found. I think I may have left it in the taxi cause I remember digging around for my keys and taking the phone out to get a better feel around the bottom of the bag. I am just annoyed with myself for being such a loser, and being so out of sorts after so much alcohol that I lost my phone and almost destroyed my glasses. Say no to tequila, friends.

edit: I found the phone, in the deep, dark recesses of the handbag. I swear, I was sober today! And congrats to the West Indies cricket team. What an awesome display of cricketing today, guys, especially after Friday's debacle. Keep it up.

In other news, I was telling PT last night about the guys at work and how all work stops, chairs turn and faces light up in interest, when I pass by to say hello. It's so funny, kinda cute, but ultimately a dead end. There is one dude at work who seems to be actively trying to "cop a feel" aka make a move. Not my type but he is cool I guess. I have not had much conversation with him but he always passes by my desk and says hi and makes idle conversation. So I see a friend request on Facebook from some dude I don't know. The photo shows a half naked man - some dude, from the neck down, in just a pair of skimpy boxers, taking a photo in front of a mirror. I said to myself, "Ugh. I don't know people like this" and clicked "Ignore". Yes yes. I am terrible but if you're just figuring this out, then boo to you.


So work dude comes to my desk and asks me if I saw his friend request, and I realise the dude who I have to call for help with my pc is the dude wearing Chippendale boxers on Facebook. I wanted to laugh, but I am too polite and told him yes, I saw it but explained that I don't add people I work with to my FB list. It's true though - I don't. It's the same reason why even if he were a Tamale kinda guy, I probably would not date him, cause I just believe in keeping my personal life and my work life separate. I have only ever dated one person I worked with and it was not too bad cause I left that place about 2-3 weeks after we started seeing each other. But as a general rule, I think it is an open invitation for conflict, gossip and farseness. So I don't want this dude all up in my business and him having my photos open for the entire company to see. When I saw the request the name did not even alert me - an indication of how little I know about this person. In any event, I would feel very odd adding a dude who is taking half naked photos of himself and posting them on the internet. I would hate to know this person is sitting in the dark somewhere, while on my Facebook page, doing God knows what with himself.

Exhausted

Well, I got my glasses repaired - though it was risky cause they were damaged so badly that the optician told me there was a very good chance they would break when he tried to repair them. But when he called me an hour later and told me to come pick up my eyewear, I was thrilled.

Now Lou was aghast that my glasses cost me so much - but my last pair lasted 6 years, and I still have them. The only reason I changed them cause they had lost their colour and honestly, they were a bit dated. But when I buy glasses, it is a serious investment. I don't mind spending a lot on a pair of glasses - considering they're outerwear, worn on the part of the body people stare at the most, they have the ability to drastically change one's appearance, I have to wear them everyday and I wear them almost all the time, and I need durable cause I am a busy person who often drops her glasses. lol. So yeah, I spend a pretty penny on them. And I hate having to say this everytime - not quoting in US dollars here.

The weekend is all about me getting some much needed rest. The new job keeps me very busy and I have worked late every day this week. Thursday was the worst though. I spent 18 hours in heels - literally running around in them, and now I feel like the nerve endings in my toes are shot. When I try to walk with bare feet, I feel pins and needles in my toes. It hurts like woah. My feet are crying out for some tender love and care. I went into the shoe store today and saw the hottest pair of red heels but uh-uh...tried on some loafers instead. When you work with some real divas though, you feel compelled to still try them on and see...just see how they look. Yeah. I work in an office of divas where it's almost like a competition to see who looks best on any given day. I think I have my own style which has worked well for me since I joined the workforce after university and I know what I like and what looks good on me with regards to colour, cut, style etc. So I don't feel this overwhelming need to compete with workzillas. Still, I saw those shoes looking really good with some grey trousers and my new red shirt. But not at the expense of my feet's comfort.

I am very tired and for once I am happy that I don't have a life - cause it's all about lying in bed this weekend and just vegging and sleeping. Adonis called me last night to tell me he still misses me and I guess I will hold on to that this weekend, cause he is not here to rub my feet and that's really what I need right about now. But gosh, I feel lonely.

A Pencil saves the day

Well, further to yesterday's post, I was redeemed by a pencil.

We had a very busy day yesterday planning for an event but I had let it go, despite not having the conversation first thing in the morning. I had still planned to have said conversation but was leaving it for later. Anyway, during a quiet moment, my boss and I were sitting down having some coconut water and she started - with an apology. She said she was very sorry for what happened, so much so that when I had left the office that same day, and she and my manager were alone, she told her what the whole story was. She said

I realised you were upset, cause all I could hear was the rapid beat of your pencil as you tapped it angrily across your notebook. And I said to myself, "wow, Tamale is pissed. Tamale is going to attack somebody".

So as soon as me and my pencil left the room, she told my manager what had really happened. So my angry pencil percussion put things to right and I am glad cause my first impression of my boss was a very wholesome one and I did not want to be proven wrong and have another shitty boss. But we're cool.

I am still at home at 7am cause I got home at 45 minutes after midnight after a very successful and fun event. It's great when you work in a place where you, your entire team and your managers can share 3 rounds of tequila shots and a good booty shaking. Not so good when your $5000 glasses get smashed and you have to hope they can be fixed so you can continue to enjoy some ROI and vanity. Will hopefully sort out the upset stomach from too much liquor and the smashed eyewear from too much dancing at some point today.

Hung out to dry

When I left the office today, smoke was coming out of my ears, I was so steamed. Yesterday, against my better judgement, I listened to my boss and did something I knew I should not have done, but she insisted. Today, the shit hit the fan and our manager sent an email to my boss referring to me as "that new girl", when only 2 hours earlier she passed my desk and said "Hi Tamale, how you doing?" So clearly she was more than a little upset. Now, there is a whole other story about the manager that would explain her reaction to something that in the grand scheme of things was not a crisis, but that would require time and more privacy. Needless to say, my boss sat there and read out the email to me and goes, "What is she talking about?"

Red flag #1.

Later that day I head into the meeting where manager brings up the issue and my boss sits there like a mouse and says nothing. Steam building. She goes on and on about how I am new so she can let it go (it really was not that serious either but this apparently is an issue of sorts) and asks me how I could let it happen. At this point, based on the deafening silence next to me, I turn my head to look at my boss and the silence grows. No response. No "I told her to do it and I insisted she do it". No explanation. No support. No nothing. Tamale - being hung to dry. Steam boiling. The matter was squashed in the end and all was well with the world but all was not well with Tamale and I walked out of there like a pricked bull. And she knew I was damn vex cause she did not come to my desk again for the day, which is rare, and when I was leaving, I only waved and kept pelting down the corridor like a cat out of a pet shop, until she called out to me to ask me if I was alright.

The place is like primary school - no lie. I mean, if I told you what the issue was you would probably be like "that's it?" To hear the woman go on and on about it. But then I can understand why she was a bit miffed cause the day before she told us she does not like things done that way, so when my boss told me to do it, I told her I did not think that was a good idea. I should have stood my ground but she said, "Don't worry. I will handle it." Handle it, my fat ass! Instead I was manhandled! I am really annoyed by this and if she wants to not end up like my last boss - on an eternal shit list - we need to have a conversation in the morning, cause I am a festerer. I let things build and sour, and I just got there. It's not good to let boss issues fester so early on. We will be having a serious chat in the morning about how I do shit. I don't appreciate being hung out to dry like a wet panty after a hurricane!

Not enough time

I promise to do better with the reading of people's journals. I am very tired this morning. It is lame how early I get to work and still leave 12 hours later. I'm the type of person who prefers to get as much stuff done, rather than come home with baggage on my mind. I could not sleep last night cause of one particular piece of baggage - a lethal piece brought on by the high school...no...sorry...the kindergarten type vibe in the place. I contend that wherever there are many women, there will always be drama and here = D-R-A-M-A. am drama-free, and like to stay under the radar and suddenly I am in the middle of a battle I really 1. wanted no part of and 2. had no idea I would be part of. I just got there for pete's sake.

I know of 12 grey hairs in total on my body. I am trying my best to not quickly double, triple or quadruple that number by absorbing the bullshit at this place. It's great distraction - the work, that is - but I can really do without the drama.

K to the P

Queen's Park Oval under some heavy dark clouds

It was not so sunny as we had hoped but it did not rain either, which was great. But it was a lovely day of cricket. Trinis know how to have a good time and we had a good time, especially since the West Indies beat England. Oh yeah, the beers were flowing then, and the party went on long after the last run. Plenty to eat, drink and stare at. I was on KP patrol and guess what? He was fielding on the boundary as I asked, for the majority of the English innings. I had my binoculars ready and waiting like the KP stalker I am. Every chance I got, I was staring at KP on the boundary. He is hot! I want a KP for my room!

#24 - Kevin Pietersen

My own English lovebun called me after the game to tell me he wished he was here. Awww. That was so cute. That dude really likes me you know - he is just communicatively challenged. While my cousin brought some woman to the game as the third person. Alright for him to get some ass...but not me.

I was not so hot today cause I was so tired from the weekend. I am hoping to be in bed, under blankie in the next 30mins.

Bat and balls - how phallic

Kevin Peter Pietersen, English cricketer and hottie

It's cricket weekend in lovely Trinidad. After a long week of working, I was ready to kick back and just enjoy my weekend. Weekends are always so much better when one has a job that tires you out on the 5 other days.

Today, I thought I would meet Kevin Pietersen, but it did not happen. I did manage to meet a couple of the other players from the Barmy Army (one was cute but I forget his name), but no Kevin. I would tell you what fun I was up to today but because a few thousand other people were there as part of my fun, and I am not willing to announce myself and my blog, you will just be none the wiser. But it was good fun and pretty amusing. I am always amused at the lengths some of my local Indian gals would go for a foreign cricketer to notice them. They never fail to throw themselves at these poor dudes. One girl just walked up to a couple of the players and with her American/hood-rat Trini combo accent, she was just making an ass of herself and my shoulders were heaving as I tried to stifle the laughter. All she needed to do was sit there, and look hot - like me. But then, she wasn't hot, so maybe a bit of effort really was required. But if she did not achieve anything else, she made me laugh and she made the guys laugh at her when she walked back to her seat. Amusing. These dudes have their hot model girlfriends back home and even if I were a man and I was away from home and hard-up for some ass, that would not be the ass I would hit up. But then, everyone should have a dream in life, and some self-confidence.

It would have been even more fun if I could have met Kevin Pietersen.

Just too hot. I love cricket and typically cricket is not as sexy as football. Footballers in those shorts, with those legs are at the apex of male athletic hotness, along with track athletes in the spandex suits. But cricket has typically been very conservative - dudes in either Test whites or One-Day International country colours. Long pants, loose fitting shirts, pads, helmet. But every once in a while, there is a hot cricketer on the pitch who makes my natural love of the game even more special. There have been a few - Sachin is hottish, Mark Waugh was hot, and so was Viv Richards. Ramnaresh Sarwan ain't too bad. And Kevin Pietersen. Yep. Cricket will not be left out from among the world's hot sports.

The West Indies team plays England tomorrow in a Twenty20 match at the Queen's Park Oval and I will be looking out for Kevin. Gosh, I hope he comes down to the boundary. Still, I will be in a maroon state of mind. Even if they're not as hot as Kevin, my heart will always belong to the West Indies.