I try not to get too caught up in the daily news, mostly because it is all so ghastly and negative. But to isolate oneself from reality is folly. As a single woman, it is imperative that I arm myself with the knowledge of what is happening out there to other people. And the headline this morning was just another sad story. I am all too alarmed by the regularity of crimes like these now. It's funny when we joke about the Lifetime television type movies, but when the shit is real, it's not that hilarious.
It begs the question - who can one trust? You let someone into your home and into your life and they take your heart and just as easily they can take your life. The breakfast roundtable discussion this morning concluded that this is very regular among East Indians - this man killing woman then killing self phenomenon, and the headlines do indeed support this. But is it as simple as saying one won't date an East Indian man? I don't think so cause what is to stop some jealous, enraged, psycho, regardless of class, race, religion etc from breaking into a woman's home and slicing open her throat because as far as he is concerned - if he cannot have her, then noone else can.
I am so sick and tired of hearing about women who tried to rid themselves of these men for various reasons and then having to sacrifice their lives in order to finally accomplish this. So, does one bar onself from finding love and happiness in a relationship, for fear of ending up another victim? I think that would be just as silly as not reading the paper to spare oneself the pain of reality. At the moment one girlfriend is in very similar circumstances and I am very worried for her - we laugh it off during our chats but it is a very real scenario - one we both think about in our alone moments. So what do we do? You sometimes look for the signs that this person may be unwell or obsessive - but are those signs always there?
I find it incredibly hard to read the news cause in any situation laid out in black ink on the newsprint, it could very easily have been me or a member of my family or someone very close to me. This woman just went out to start her day like a normal person - her regular routine of jogging around the city. And then this. I read that article this morning and it made me so sad cause this man could have simply walked away and gone on with his life if he really wanted to. But he did not want to. He wanted to be the hunter and make her the prey until he caught her and killed her - robbing her family of a daughter and a sister and a friend - and robbing single women of optimism that maybe there is still good out there. And then killed himself - committing two acts of cowardice in one day and robbing her family of any form of real justice.
It is a crazy old world at times
ReplyDeleteSo sad and such a waste. It's hard to trust anyone anymore.
ReplyDeleteThis is going to sound very cynical, but these things will always happen, regardless of race or culture, and I’m afraid it’s more to do with how some women will trust a man they’ve fallen for – against all warning signs.
ReplyDeleteThere was a barmaid of the pub I used to go to regularly in my early twenties whom I knew slightly. She left because she got married to a man from a nearby town: a respectable man, a driving instructor, a divorcee with his own house. As later emerged in court her friends didn’t like him and found him ‘creepy’, largely because of his behaviour towards her 13-year-old daughter, but ‘didn’t like to tell her’ because they didn’t want to alienate her. It turned out he had a criminal record for indecently exposing himself to schoolgirls.
About a year later he’d murdered both of them, and is now serving life imprisonment. Though the full story never emerged, it was established that he’d been having sex with the daughter, apparently with the mother turning a blind eye or at least giving him the benefit of the doubt, before something triggered the killing.
The moral of that grisly tale is, I’m sorry to say, that you should trust no one, or at least exercise caution with any would-be lover or husband where there is any possibility of a background of violence, jealousy, or, in this case, criminality. Women, and to a degree men, let their hearts rule their heads, and it does end very sadly sometimes.
Sorry about the length of that – but your post brought back a few memories.
the sad thing is that we hear about this more and more and that's only the cases that are reported.
ReplyDeleteOne year, there were four murder-suicides in the space of a month. All husband's killing wives, then themselves. Scary.
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